Pregnancy Q+A and My First Trimester Favorites
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pregnancy q+A, a recap of the first trimester, and things that got me through it!
It’s been a few days since we shared our announcement, and I cannot reiterate how touched and appreciative I am of your support. I had hoped that you’d be happy and encouraging, but I could’ve never imagined the thoughtful comments, emails, and messages that I’d receive. Still working on responding to them all, but thank you. It’s not always easy to share life-changing news when your business is your life, and your life is your business, but the overwhelming majority of you have been truly remarkable.
While I’m well into my second trimester now (just over 17 weeks), I wanted to share a recap of my first trimester, answer some of your burning questions and share some things that helped me be more comfortable. I feel like I scoured every inch of the internet and couldn’t find much on first-trimester things, so I hope this is helpful to anyone who just found out or anyone who is in the thick of it right now, as many of my first-trimester symptoms have decided to linger into the second in addition to some fun new ones. If there’s one thing I didn’t realize about pregnancy, it’s that every day is a new journey. For some reason, I thought that once I hit/passed certain milestones, things would come and go, but I’m learning that it’s not linear.
I’ve also been privileged to be able to go through this process alongside (or just after) some of my closest friends and sister-in-law, and that has honestly gotten me through some of the roughest patches, so if you feel like you are going through this alone, never, ever hesitate to reach out (email is probably easier for me to see/read and respond thoughtfully) and please know that everyone’s journies are so different! It’s been fascinating for me to ask and hear about how every pregnancy treats everyone so differently. My tips/tricks here may not work for you, so take them with a grain of salt! People will give you endless advice, so take it all in stride and do what feels good. You know your body best!
As I mentioned in my announcement post, I acknowledge anyone working on expanding their families. My sincerest thoughts and hopefulness are with you. I never want our happiness or highs to make anyone feel less joyful about their own hopes or situation. I can relate and found it helpful to remind myself there is not one limited number of babies out there – one person’s pregnancy doesn’t mean there still isn’t a baby in the future for us!
here’s a glimpse into how the first trimester looked like for me:
The majority of my symptoms usually hit around 3 pm, like clockwork. Between 5 and 9 pm were (and still are some nights) usually my witching hours. Walter was delighted to have a partner in crime during his afternoon naptime sessions. He and Brian took excellent care of me. But once I figured out the timing/cadence of how I was feeling, I tried to structure my days, get as much as I could in the morning, and let myself rest, oftentimes pushing things to the next day! I realize I am fortunate to be able to call the shots and rearrange my own schedule, and my heart goes out to anyone not as lucky and pushing through right now. I have a newfound appreciation for pajama sets. I’ll admit I may have gone overboard, but every day at three it was pajama party time, and I got a few extra pairs to avoid laundry for a few extra days. Pajama roundup soon? 🤣
Pregnancy Q&A
Your #1 Most asked question:
are you going to find out the sex of the baby, or wait and be surprised?
Someone described me as “chill” the other day, and not only did I laugh, but I was truly shocked because I don’t feel like a very chill-vibes person. While maybe I show my chill side on the interwebs, I very much do not have the chill or patience to KNOW there is a surprise and wait for it. We did a blood test as early as I could (around ten weeks) and found out then, but I will wait until after our anatomy scan to confirm and share publicly what it is. Healthy was our number one choice, and so far, so good, thankfully. I don’t want to give anything away, so I’ll share my thoughts (and I’ve got A LOT of them) on this later. Any guesses? You’ve got a 50/50 shot. 😉
how did you know you were ready?
Truthfully, I don’t know if I will ever be ready. I’ve been very open and honest about the fact that I have been in therapy for nearly nine years, and it’s something that I had to work on, especially with the previous trauma I’ve been through. I’ve never discussed this online, but I may share more in another blog post someday. Here’s your friendly reminder to always be kind because you truly never know what anyone has been/is currently going through.
For me, it was helpful to work on becoming more open to the idea vs. crossing an invisible finish line of readiness. Brian and I have been together for nine years, married for five this June, and it’s always been one of our hopes to start a family. I don’t think I’ll ever feel ready, but I’ve always been a “jump in first, learn to swim later” person.
Why were you on birth control at such a young AGE and for so long?
Dozens of questions about why I’ve been on birth control for so long, and despite your presumptions, I was not a sexually active preteen. I was, however, diagnosed with dysmenorrhea shortly after getting my periods, having to miss school 1-2 days each month because of how horrible and violent they were. After lots of trial and error, I found one that balanced my hormones, allowed me to function, and manage my symptoms! I was on Larin Fe for most of my teenage years and early adulthood.
what did you do to prepare for Getting off Birth Control and eventually conceiving?
I will say it is the most bizarre feeling to be avoiding pregnancy your entire life, thinking you will get pregnant if you go into a hot tub with a boy and then one day wake up and be like, “Okay, I want to start trying” and realize it’s not all that simple. The first step was getting off birth control, and when I tell you I was scared, I was horrified. Flashbacks of my early preteen years came flooding in, and I wanted to be as prepared as possible for the unknown.
My OBGYN suggested some preliminary bloodwork and switching to a prenatal a few months before getting off birth control, so I switched from the women’s 18+ multivitamin (which I was taking since 2019) to the prenatal from Ritual. I pulled the ingredients up for my doctor, and she gave me a thumbs up. Other than that, it was primarily mental for me. I read Ashley Torres from Everyday Pursuits’ blog “Goodbye Birth Control: A Diary of Balancing Out My Body” which I found very insightful. I kept a digital diary of my symptoms and how I felt; I highly recommend doing that!
Once I was off birth control, I knew I needed to start tracking and seeing if/how/when I was ovulating. I was already using the Flo app to track periods, so I started paying more attention to ovulation and purchased these test kits, which eventually worked for us. We did conceive successfully without treatment, and it is not lost on me how lucky we are to say we could do so.
can I ask how long you were trying to conceive?
When I was on my own trying to conceive (TTC) journey, I read every single blog, thread, and comment section I could find to see how long it took people to get pregnant, and no matter what the answer was, it never made me feel hopeful. So, respectfully, I’m not sure sharing that information would benefit anyone. I never want to fuel anyone’s negative comparison game or make anyone feel better or less than me on this topic because this journey is so personal to each individual. I hope you can respect that.
how are you feeling, and how are you handling your body changes?
Thanks for asking! I’m slowly escaping the first-trimester fog, battling nausea, tiredness, emotions, and food aversions. I’ve also been experiencing new symptoms, like restless legs and hip soreness, and sleeping is becoming more challenging. More on that below!
To be honest, I knew my belly would grow, and as someone who has never had a flat stomach, I was okay with it. I *knew* that my boobs were going to grow, but man, did they grow, and I know it’s only the beginning of this journey for them. As I mentioned on IG the other day, they used to be sisters… but now they’re distant cousins. I’m doing my best to embrace the changes and not put to my pressure on myself or have the perfect bump, as we see sensationalized online. But it is certainly a journey, let me tell ya!
When did you start to need new clothes/bras? I’m six weeks along, and we’re similar in size!
Congrats! When I tell you the heavens opened up and angels started singing when I tried on my first pair of maternity leggings around 10-12 weeks, I’m not even being dramatic. I’ve been stuffing myself like a sausage into so many pairs of pants and telling myself, okay, THIS is the last time you can wear these. I didn’t mean to deceive anyone, but I ordered and wore many of my usual bottoms that I feature on my page a lot in one size up in hopes no one would get suspicious. Remember, everyone is different, so you do and get stuff when you feel is good for you!
My boobs were the first thing to tell me that I was pregnant before I even knew. BK and I did a chest workout that week, so I assumed maybe I pulled something, but I could barely hug or scrape up against anything without shrieking. Don’t tough it out until you can’t stand your bras anymore. If you’ve been pregnant before, you likely know the game – wear regular clothes until you can’t button your jeans anymore and then change to maternity clothes. Please don’t do this with your bras. Most changes in breast size occur in the first trimester. You will feel much more comfortable if you refit during or at the end of the first trimester!
As I mention in my maternity and nursing bra guide, get some bras that will fit you during pregnancy! General guidance is up one band size and two cup sizes. Also, consider some comfy bras/bralettes for sleeping and lounging. Breast tissue tends to be more sensitive during pregnancy, so you might appreciate the extra support. Sharing some of my favorites below but also in my recent post on wireless bras.
any cravings or aversions surrounding food?
As someone who loves food, this has been so difficult for me. My family and friends have been like, “are you okay?” because I don’t have the interest in food I once did! Like not even pizza is exciting to me anymore. Most meats, lettuce, and stuff I usually enjoyed were a no-go. I still gag at chicken and BK’s sirloin steaks in the fridge. I’ve been able to eat a lot of eggs and nuts, and occasionally I’ll do seafood, but Ritual’s prenatal/postnatal protein powder was a lifeline for me at one point.
Saltines, graham crackers, and Triscuits have been good to me. I accidentally left a sleeve of graham crackers on the ottoman, and Walter enjoyed them too. I love and crave super cold water or drinks, often making slushies with this freezer cup. Anything citrus-related has been excellent too. I should’ve bought stock in Sumo Citrus this year. Missed opportunity.
any tricks to combat nausea?
Definitely speak to your doctor before trying new regimens, but I’ve enjoyed sucking on these Preggie Pop Drops and these Tummy Drops. My doctor recommended Unisom and B6 in addition to limiting my dairy intake in the afternoon/evenings, which has helped. Vernor’s Ginger Ale is also fantastic (if you can find it, it’s the best and most ginger-y). For some reason, being nauseous makes me cry, maybe because I know throwing up might soon follow, so any distraction or laying down and cuddling with BK or Walter helped too. Walter’s potato body is the perfect little spoon.
Are there any apps you use to track baby, symptoms, etc.?
I like a little variety, so I’ve been using Flo, What to Expect, and Ovia. They’re all great, and I like having them all because they give different information. Ovia can compare your baby to a new French pastry each week, so I definitely enjoy sending that to my family each week. Not sure if you believe in signs but the week that was also the one-year anniversary of my uncle’s tragic passing was a Napolean dessert, his favorite. 🥹
will your content remain the same, or do you plan to adjust to more mom-focused content?
To be frank, this was the nicest version of this question that asked a ton, so I’ll reshare what I said the other day on Instagram. I want to reiterate that I am still me despite my physically altered state. While I can understand and empathize with the assumptions based on maybe someone else you know or another account that you follow, I am still planning on showing up as me. Like any new chapter in my life that I’ve shared in the past seven years with you, it will be an added piece of the pie. Who doesn’t like more pie?
As humans, as women, we evolve, and no one should be shamed or made to feel bad about it. As I’ve grown as a human, this platform has evolved, and will continue to do so. But to answer your question, I have no stark plans to completely do a 180 on anyone or alienate the topics I love to share here anytime soon. As Moira from Schitt’s Creek says, I’m just going to fold it in. But how? I just will, and that is something we’ll figure out together.
how do you see your career shifting with a baby?
I’m just sure it will. I know my priorities will shift. I’m grateful to have many role models in this space that inspire me to find a new rhythm that will work for our family. I know it won’t be easy, but I’m confident I can handle it. I’ve worked really hard over the last several years to outsource what I can and get more comfortable with asking for help. I will take it one day at a time, fully trusting the best is yet to come!
how did you tell your family? I’m sure they’re excited!
So I managed to tell and get BK, our parents, and my sister on video. For BK, I told him I needed help finding the lighting/angle for filming a reel (something he helps me with often) and had him hold a box filled with the positive test up to the camera. For my parents, I told them I was doing a sponsored post with an ornament company, and I needed to film their reactions for an upcoming sale post. The ornaments read “grandpa” and “grandpa, est. 2023.” My favorite one was my sister, and I had her put noise-canceling headphones on and repeat out loud what she thought I was saying by reading my lips. Should I share these? If so, how?
now onto some of my tried and true favorites…
first-trimester must-haves
As I mentioned above, nausea and morning sickness has been so real. I alternated back and forth between these Preggie Pop Drops and these Tummy Drops. They both have a few different flavor varieties, so choose which sounds good! These were great to keep in my purse, especially when traveling and during those rough patches. My doctor recommended Unisom and B6, which I’ve been taking, too, which has helped a bit in addition to limiting my dairy intake in the afternoon/evenings. I was/am SO THIRSTY, so it was great to have this mug on hand at all times to keep my drinks super cold (like I wanted). Here is a similar option for less. To switch up the flavors, I like these electrolyte mixes - the orange is my favorite! This is kind of a joke that I linked saltine crackers, but this list would not be complete without them. They HAVE to be the premium brand and soothe you in a way that doesn’t get enough respect. Animal crackers, graham crackers, and Triscuits are also great too if you’re craving variety.
As far as undergarments and clothing go, it felt like my preferences nearly changed overnight. Sleeping was too painful without a bra, so I wear this one almost every night, and this one has been one of my favorite everyday bras. After I got fitted at Lace & Day, I rediscovered Evelyn & Bobbie bras which I resisted for years, but in this new phase of life, they’ve been fantastic for wire-free lift and support. My panty preferences changed, too, I can no longer tolerate anything tight or pressing on my belly. I’m so glad I had this pack of panties already in my drawer and have since repurchased more because they truly feel like you’re not wearing anything. They come in two sizes, I wear them both, and they’ve gotten mixed up in my drawer, so I don’t know what’s what, but I know I recently ordered the standard size as a size 16-ish, and they work. Here is the plus-size one (1X-4X)!
Maternity leggings, why did I resist you for so long? You are precious and so kind to me. I invested in these in an XL, and they were worth every penny. I’m considering a second pair. I also love these for a more inexpensive option (size large was good for me), and I still had a few older pairs of these leggings in a size 14, which have been extremely comfortable. Treat yourself to a new pajama set, I love these ones, and they are also available in plus sizes, but for a more inexpensive pair, I also bought this set twice and have been VERY impressed (I sized up because my ‘cousins’ need the additional room right now). In the early days, this pregnancy pillow was terrific for my growing and tender bust area, and I’ve since used it around my belly for sleeping. I’ve brought it on trips and think it was a great find. I may need a bigger one now that I’m in my second trimester, but I will save that update for my second-trimester post!
As far as skincare goes, wowza — I was not prepared for how much you should avoid. The first thing I did when I found out was to go through my current regimen and product that I owned and searched for it on 15 Minute Beauty’s blog. She has extensive guides and suggestions on what is pregnancy and nursing safe and what to avoid, organized by brand. I do plan on doing an updated skincare post soon, but I wanted to share a few favorites that I’ve loved thus far. I keep this lip mask in my afternoon nap spot, and it’s super hydrating and less expensive than another one of my favorites, although also safe for pregnancy! Elemis is one of my tried and true brands, many of their products are pregnancy safe, including their marine cream, which is great for everyday hydration. Winter + pregnancy has been hard on my skin, I’ve developed pregnancy-related eczema, but this ultra-healing lotion has been great, as well as this one recommended by my dermatologist.
As mentioned above, I cannot recommend Ritual vitamins and protein powder enough. There were some days when I could barely stomach anything, but to get something in my system, I could get a shake down for some protein. I’ve used their multivitamins since 2019, and it was easy to switch to their prenatal vitamin, showing up on my doorstep every month. CARALYN30 works for 30% off your first month for a limited time if you’re interested.
This was A LOT longer than I expected, but we had a lot to cover. I hope it was helpful. Feel free to leave any questions, requests for more or any of your tried and true favorites below. Thanks so much for reading!
xx CMK
Photo at the top by Ryan Kell